One needs to approach sexuality with respect, kindness, and openness. One needs to understand that the alternative to celibacy in Buddhism is not merely selfish indulgence of one’s desire at the expense of others. One can ‘dress’ sexual misconduct in the clothing of freedom and lack of moralistic inhibitions, but it remains an obstacle to practice nonetheless.This is an important statement in view of the high regard shown to celibate practitioners in terms of their discipline. It could be something of a shock to some to realise that non-celibacy is a more demanding path, and that its discipline is vast and subtle. It should be accurately understood, that ordination into the gö kar chang lo’i dé (gos dKar lCang lo’i sDe) is not chosen as an ‘easier option’ than celibacy. The monastic path is simpler and easier to follow. It is completely structured and designed to support the individual, whereas the structure of Vajrayana embraces endless nuances of reality as the play of precision and passion.
Aro Encyclopaedia Index: Tralam-mé: founding relationships on Vajrayana principles by Ngak’chang Rinpoche & Khandro Déchen